Episode 143

Balancing Giving And Receiving in Relationships – BDay Fun Day 1

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This message touches on something many of us feel but rarely name, when we give and give in relationships but struggle to receive. Whether in business or in life, healthy connection depends on energetic exchange. And when that exchange becomes unbalanced, we start to feel it in our bodies, our emotions, and our sense of clarity.

I explore the energy of connection, the importance of being present and listening deeply, and how strengthening your relationship with yourself creates healthier, more fulfilling connections with others.

EPISODE 143: Listen using the player below, or click the links to your fave platform to subscribe and listen over there:

Connection Is an Energetic Exchange

Every relationship is an energy exchange. That’s true in business, in friendship, and in family. When you walk into a room, you can feel it. You either feel nourished and uplifted, or you walk away feeling drained. That is energy.

I’ve had to let go of relationships that left me exhausted for the rest of the day. And since doing that, I’ve created space for connections that energise me. Relationships where we both walk away feeling seen and uplifted.

That’s what you want to look for, the relationships where the exchange flows both ways. Whether you’re at the beach with a friend or on a client call, your energy matters. If you’re always walking away tired, that’s something to look at.

And if you’re in business, this applies just as much. A client session should not leave you completely depleted. Yes, you might be tired in the best way, because you gave with love and presence, but you shouldn’t feel emptied out. When you feel drained, it’s usually a sign something’s misaligned in the energetic exchange.

Where Are You Overgiving, Under-Receiving, or Holding Back?

This is where things get really honest. Because most of us are doing at least one of these, often without realising it.

  • You might be overgiving, pouring out so much in your sessions, freebies, or challenges that your clients walk away overloaded. Instead of being excited to work with you, they feel overwhelmed.
  • You might be under-receiving, giving and giving without allowing anything to come back toward you. And even if you say you’re fine, over time that imbalance will show up in your energy, your health, or your mood.
  • Or you might be holding back, afraid to share your full wisdom or presence, unsure if it will be received. So you play small. You give a little, but not from your full power.

All three of these distort the flow of connection. And all three are invitations to shift.

Think about it like a car. If you keep driving without fuelling up, eventually you run out. You need to receive too. That might look like rest. Nature. Nourishment. Let yourself be filled in ways that restore your energy.

Shift from Transactional to Transformational

So much of what’s out there in the coaching space has become transactional. You sign up for a free program, and suddenly you’re hit with five emails a day pushing you to buy. That’s not connection. That’s pressure. And it turns people off.

I recently had this experience myself. I loved what someone taught, but the follow-up was so intense that I had to step away. I even emailed to say thank you, and received no response. That silence said everything.

Transactional energy misses the point. Transformational energy, on the other hand, is where magic happens. It’s about presence. Listening. Respecting people’s timing. Making them feel like more than a number.

That’s the energy I bring into every offer. Whether it’s a group program or a membership, I want people to feel seen and held, not sold to. Because that’s how long-term, soul-aligned relationships are built.

The Power of Presence and Deep Listening

Presence is everything. In my past roles, as a nurse, paramedic, lifesaver, I was present. I had to be. And it became second nature. That’s also what makes deep listening possible.

Real listening means we stop thinking of what to say next. We don’t jump in to fix, relate, or interrupt. We hold space. We tune in. We hear what’s being said, and often what’s not being said.

Too often, people listen to respond. Not to understand.

And when I find myself in conversations where I’m not truly being heard, I step back. Those aren’t the relationships I choose to deepen anymore. I want a mutual presence. Mutual care. Mutual energy.

That’s sacred listening. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being here. With your full self.

Strengthen the Connection With Yourself First

All of this comes back to the relationship you have with yourself. If you don’t listen to your own needs, if you constantly abandon your truth to keep others happy, eventually the disconnection shows up everywhere else too.

Put yourself first, not from selfishness, but from sovereignty. Because when you nourish your own energy, you have more to give. You show up fuller. You receive more clearly. And the people around you feel the difference.

So take a moment to reflect:

  • Are you letting go of your needs to maintain certain relationships?
  • Are you tired from giving more than you receive?
  • Are you holding back parts of yourself out of fear?

You don’t need to answer right away. Just start noticing. That awareness is enough to begin the shift.

Final Reflections

Connection isn’t about doing more. It’s about being present with what’s real. It’s about balancing what you give with what you receive. And most of all, it’s about holding yourself in enough care that every relationship you nurture starts from within.

You are not here to be drained. You are here to connect, to create, and to grow. And that begins with how you treat your own energy.

Here for the links that may have been referenced in the show or is complementary to this episode.

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